How I discovered an "aurat" during my demo

"Hi,This is Shruti from Vector Marketing" is my pet dialogue whenever I call up people to fix an appointment assuming that they would understand my words and probably my name as well..."Shrooooooti???","Shweti???","Shuuuuuti??""Pardon Me!!!!" is the substitute of "hello" from the other side..."Ah...Shruti"..I try my level best to explain them..."Oh!!! Shroooti??yeah?? "...... "oh yeah!!!!"I say..just to convince myself that this is probably the best way they can pronounce my name.....


but this time I knew I was calling up a Punjabi middle aged lady...so applying my common sense,I refrained from my pet dialogue and said "Sat Shri Akal Aunty Ji, main Shruti bol rahi haan (Hello,This is Shruti speaking)".....and I was pretty confident that she will understand my "tuttti bhajjji" Punjabi.Contrary to that.... "Haan,,,Kauuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnn???????" She shouted at the topmost level of her voice......I was baffled at the first instance....probably because I was expecting a courteous telephone behaviour..."Ah! Ah! Ah!!! Shruti.... Aunty" I literally had to gather my courage to talk to her...huh...finally I ended up the rudest telephone call and headed on to give a demonstration....





Landed up at their home...and rung their bell....once..twice...thrice and the fourth time..."Oh my god...dont tell me they are not at home..shit..so bad...why did they fix the appointment then!!!" I was so sad...not because they wasted my time..but because I faced such a rude conversation and still couldnt make money out of it....I turned back to head onto my home" ......





"Bell kyu nahi bajayi????",shouted a lady from behind in the same rude tone." Tumne bell nahi dekhi?? Yaha lagi hai side pe..aise bajate hai,...." And she rung the bell to "demonstrate" her "hi-tech" bell.... "Ah...well...aunty maine ring ki..y..a..........." and she 'overpowered' me..."Vo to maine apne 'camere'(thats the way she pronounces 'camera') se dekh liya...hamare ghar me camera lga hai..jo bhi aata hai..camera me uski 'phoootu' aa jati hai"......"Oh really??? Awesome!!!" I complimented her hi-tech device only to make me enter into her home.





Right in front of the door was the culprit .."the switched on Vaccuum Cleaner"..Damn...they place it just close to the door so that its 'melodious song' could expose people like me to her wrath.

She asked me what I do, where I stay, when did I come from India,where do I hail from India,my siblings,how did I get into University of British Columbia,what does my mom do,why my dad is not here.....it seemed to me that as soon as I ended the call with her,she sat down preparing a quesstionaire and kept bombarding me with those until her list was complete.And then was the time for her ultimate question..."Where do you stay in Surrey?".I told her my 'house' was close to her friend's who gave me her recommendation. And she stood up from the chair.."House???????????????????"............ "But your landlords told me you stay in their basement"..... I was dumb struck... "house=home" is all I meant to say...and not a 'condo'
"Oh!!!!!! thats what I thought how come you stay in a "house"!!!"..

Weird!!!! really weird...people sometimes are unbelievable..She owns a nice condo near one of the highways of the city..probably thats what raised her eyebrows when I said that I stay in a house. Huh..so she called me the "basement gal"

Never mind...I am here to make some money...thats how I convinced myself and started on with my demo...I unwrapped my beautiful Cutco knife and had barely touched it when she shouted "NO!! NO!!! NO!!!..aise pakadte hai bewaquf ladki..mujhe dikha..mai dikhaati hu...maine 10 saal restaurant me kaam kiya hai (you should not hold a knife like this stupid gal,..give it to me,I will show you,I have worked in a restaurant for 10 years)"....uhhh...that lady again made me speechless..but yeah I was happy that she revealed the only English words she had ever learnt.."no no no"..

and you mean you have worked for 10 years in a restaurant??..so that means you have been a dishwasher your whole life..so thats where your carreer starts and ends...and you are arguing with me over a basement??What a lady...a typical "AURAT"
Probably I didnt explain her that I have undergone 30 hours of rigorous training only on how to handle my Cutco knife...stupid AURAT!!

Her words started pinching me as I was giving the demo..I started loosing the smile that I was wearing when I first rung her bell.I was almost in the middle of my demo when she got up,went to the kitchen and took out a frying pan..."hamare mehmaan ne aana hai...mujhe kaam karna hai",she declared. (so you damn lady,why did you give me this time)...."Its ok aunty,I will wrap up in five minutes".... and she sat again..I rushed with my demo because I was so pissed with her..and now was the time to talk some business...and I asked for some recommendations..people whom she knows and who would be willing to have a look at the products..."matlab??? mai jaanti hu???matlab mai tumhe unka number du??tum unko pareshan karoge..call karte rahoge".. "No Aunty,we call people whom we have permission to ..we wont call up if you dont want us to,or what you can do is just give me the name of your friends..so that atleast I can put you in a lucky draw" "NO NO NO ..you will search their numbers in the telephone directory"

????

????

????

(This lady completely outwits me..you think we dont have better work? you think you are some VIP or what..you think you are Aishwarya Rai that we are dying for your numbers)

"Ok,no problem Aunty"

I packed up as quickly as I could to get out of that aurat's hell...

"phew!! what a demo...God!!!!! what a typical lady...an aurat...a typical "janani" ...god save thou lady!!"

Damn!! I came out..looked at their house and said.."kya janani hai..seriously!! she hasnt come up in life to any extent...still has the mindset of a dishwasher"...Anyways..she was a $17 part in my pay cheque..I still thank her for "giving me her time".

And yeah...I never got a chance to discover an "aurat" again..

What an experience!!!